Back

I Know Where It Ends

-----------------------------------

Sometimes I just want to curl up and hide,
to deny and run from what’s inside,
lock myself away, stop talking to friends,
but I can’t, because I know where it ends.

At 40 years old, a life spent on dope,
she used it to hide, she used it to cope,
and within the walls of an NA meeting,
weeping confession, mind overheating.

A young adult, yet again on the ward,
caught with their head in a noose of a cord,
deciding to stand and confront that pain,
and never ending up back there again.

Grief carried to the grave from the cradle,
empty bottles on a bedside table,
all tributes spoken inside that church hall,
given to the name that made their skin crawl.

So despite my woes, my worries, my fears,
I know I can’t hide, I did that for years,
there’s one path to joy, and it’s worth the fight,
to leave the dark I must turn on the light.

It’s time to be me, it’s time to be seen,
‘cause I’ve been afraid since I was fourteen,
I thought I was safe, thought I could pretend,
but I can’t, because I know where it ends.